2008 mother self forgiveness

i forgive myself for accepting andallowingmyself to think that i am ignoring my mom and she feels ignored and that s why she s now calling my brother because she wants attention
i forgive myself for accepting andallowingmyself to think i have to give my mother attention in order for me to get it from her, in order for her to support me
i forgive myself for accepting andallowing myself to feel guilty for not giving my mother what she expects of me
i forgiv emsyelf for accepting andallowingmsyelf to think i am a bad person fo rnot living up to my mothers expectations
i forgive myself fo raccepting and allowingmsyelf to feel bad for my mother feeling sad
i forgive myself fo raccepting and allowingmsyelf to think that my mother is feeling sad because she s not getting attention from me as she wanted
i forgive myself for accepting andallowingmyself to want attention in the form of support and approval from her and feel sad when i dont get it
i forgive myself fo raccepting and allowingmyself to judge myself as a mean person for not giving my mother attention right now
i forgive myself for accepting and allowingmyself to fear having to take complete care of myself
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe i have to take care of myself and not realise i just have to be and breath as breath as life within myself as who i am as all as one as equal
i forgiv emsyelf fo r not allowingmyself to realise that i am not afraid of this world i am afraid of me as one and equal to this world within separation of the world as system as who i ve allowed myself to become
i forgivemyself for accepting andallowingmyself to think that i am making my mother feel sad and bad
i forgive myself for accepting andallowoingmyself to believe that i am responsible for the way my mother feels
i forgiv emyself for accepting adnallowing myself to think i have to keep my mother happy so i can be happy
i forgive myself fo rnot allowing mysel f to realise that by feeling responsible for my mother i am denying myself as one and equal to my mother as self responsability as life within myself by separating her from me thru thoughts feelings and emotions of fear of loss
i forgive myself for accepting anda llowingmyself to fear change
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have defined myself according to my current situation, living with my mom and working as a cleaning lady
i forgiv emyself for accepting and allowingmyself to believe that if i were to 'lose' those things i would lose a part of myself
i forgive myself for accepting andallowingmsyelf to separate the current situation from myself by thinking that it is who i am
i forgive myself for accepting and allowingmyself to have defined myself according to situations that are seemingly outside of myself
i forgiv smyself for not allowingmyself to realise that what is within is without so i created and manifested these experiences for myself thru fear and thoughts feelings and emotions as the system i ve allowed myself to become
i forgiv emyself for not allowingmsyelf to realise that i am not these situations or experiences i am not fear thoughts feelings or emotions
i forgive myself for haveing allowed myself to become addicted to seeking confirmation from others

till here no further:
i don t need to take responsability for my mother, i cant it is impossible for me to take responsability for another it is denying myself
i can only take self responsability as responsability as life within myself
i cannot ignore another only myself by allowing me to be directed by the mind consciousness system that i ve allowedmyself to become
i am not insecurity
i am not dependency
i am alone
and i stand alone
i am here
i am breath
i am one and equal to my mother
i manifested my own experiences and situations for me to transcend
i transcend
i am transcendence