2008 desires

desire
look at desires ricardo--the mind operate and trap with desires--but seldom are anylived--thus the yearning continue
-bernard

i forgive myself fo r accepting and allowingmyself to desire having sex
i forgiv smyself fo rhaving accepted and allowed myself to desire reliving the emotions feelings and thoughts i experienced with sexual experiences with anton
i forgiv emyself for having accepted andallowed myself to desire antoni forgive myself for having accepted andallowed myself to desire having people see me as a picture
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire being watched
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire being touched by anton
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire being watched and judged as attractive and cool and sexy by anton and alex
i forgive myself for having accepted andallowed myself to desire others taking care of me
i forgive myself for having accepteda nd allowed myself to desire others taking away my responsability
i forgi ve myself for having accepted anda llowed myself to desire everything being easy and happy family
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire being dominated by a man
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire men especially anton and alex experiencing lust and exitement when seeing me
i forgive myself fo r having accepted andallowed myself to desire others judging me as beautiful pretty and special
i forgive myself fo rhaving accepted and allowed myself to desire being noticed and seen as remarkable by others
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire being fucked really hard
i forgive myself fo r having accepted and allowed myself to desire being raped
i forgiv e myself fo r having accepted and allowed myself to desire being dominated and put down and hurt and embarassed as a sexual experience
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire being found and seen as really smart and therefore better than others
i forgi vemyself fo r having accepted and allowed myself to desire anton finding me the best
i forgive myself fo r having accepted and allowed myself to desire being noticed by bernard
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire boys like emanuel andrew matty gabriel on the forum to notice me
i forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire being by thoughts feelings and emotions within separation of me as who i ve allowed myself to become instead of realising i am
i forgiv emyself for not accepting andallowing myself to realise that what i deny within myself as the other pole of what i desire as polarity i manifest within my world
i forgiv emyself fo r having accepted and allowed myself to exist in and as polarity as desire as mind as system as who i ve allowed myself to become

till here and no further:
i am not desire
i am not polarity
desire is thought is idea is feelings thought and emotions
it is not here actually physically
it does not exist
i exist
here
in and as breath